Awhile back I worked with a guy who talked a hell of a game. If he ever got caught in the woods he’d just take his shoe laces out and make a bow drill. He’d catch some deer with his pocket knife and live like a king.
If TSHTF he was fully prepped. He had plenty of guns and ammo and would just show up and take whatever he needed. No kidding!
This guy has a bunch of issues as you can tell, but the part that got me was he was a really smart guy. I mean really smart.
But as to making a bow drill from his shoelaces he didn’t have the first idea about wilderness survival. He was horribly out of shape and got winded walking from his car downstairs to where I work. I tried picturing him walking around looking for the right materials to make a bow drill and just couldn’t do it. He’d be puffing and wheezing and probably have a heart attack before he’d walked a mile.
By announcing his intention of showing up on someone’s doorstep (he jokingly said my doorstep) he blew his OPSEC out of the water. I made a mental note to myself that if I ever saw this idiot come on my property after TEOTWAWKI he’d be leaving much better ventilated than when he showed up.
Seriously, the guy was a blowhard and I didn’t take him or his threats too seriously. He was an ok guy, but liked to talk a big game so he wouldn’t look bad. Unfortunately for him he didn’t realize how stupid this made him look to others who are prepared and have the proper skills and knowledge to survive awhile in the bush if need be.
The Armchair Prepper
I’m sure we all know a person like this. They’re an expert on something – or everything – and they’re quick to let you know it. If you’re new to prepping don’t be fooled by this guy. If you listen to him too seriously you might wind up being worse off then if you didn’t prep at all.
A sure sign of this person is that they talk like they’re an expert, but when you try to get details out of them or ask for specifics they’re suddenly too busy to talk to you.
Most of us can spot this guy a mile away and over the years I’ve learned to steer clear of him. If he’s in the woods bumbling around I avoid him. I’ll make sure he’s not going to get into trouble or get lost, then continue on my way. If he’s out back shooting I’ll stay the hell away. Hopefully he won’t shoot himself, but if he does I don’t want to be anywhere nearby.
These guys won’t listen to you. Why should they? They already know everything. Just ask them and they’ll tell you.
If TS ever really does HTF you’ll probably need to keep an eye on this person. Chances are good they’re not properly prepared, but they might just have plenty of ordinance like my coworker and could cause trouble if they get desperate enough.
Do you know an Armchair Prepper?
Sound off below!
Guys like this are a gold mine. They usually have a big pile of all the latest gear. I hope that when TSHTF I am around one of them. It will mean less stuff I have to carry… I’ll just pick it up from under a pile of their bleached bones on the 92nd day.
Lmoa yup Korda freebies
LOL…..Jarhead Survivor, luv the line ” I made a mental note to myself that if I ever saw this idiot come on my property after TEOTWAWKI he’d be leaving much better ventilated than when he showed up.”
Merry Christmas to you, your family and all the SHTF family.
Lmoa yup lots of freebies
Luckily I don’t know anybody like this. Unfortunately I know lots of people who don’t have any clue about survival skills. I believe that a lot of my neighbors will head down the hill to civilization to be safe, that will solve many of my potential problems.
The worst plague in human history struck from 1917-1920 killing people within twelve to twenty four hours of infection. It was The Great Influenza and it sickened 2/3 of the human population and killed a third of them. No one knew who would die or when. WHEN the next one (whatever that may be) comes NO ONE WILL KNOW who will live and who will die. The stupid may well outlive the smart and the “prepared” . The “good Marine” has no more chance in combat than the S*** bird. Its really all just luck. Will the “fatboy” live long enough to learn to survive? If I die of the flu (or get nuked or starve) I WON’T CARE, and anyone living long enough to plant crops will have earned there place in the world. Even if they are no smarter than a talking monkey with a stone ax. —READ- The Great Influenza: The Story of the Deadliest Pandemic in History– by- John M. Barry This is the single most frightening book I have ever read, and its all true.
Here is a fictional(?) account of how the government will take care of you when a pandemic happens:
Ankara Fever: Journeys (Volume 1) by Vinson, Brian S. (Nov 20, 2013) (available from Amazon).
I have spent 20+ years in military and emergency services and will say that this the response that I expect to see.
I know quite a few like this!
I remember a NCO in the NJ Guard, who trained his guys that you don’t need any sort of knife, you just melt down your boots, take out the steel shank, and manufacture a knife out of that!
When I’d ask him how long he thought he would survive in a war with only one shoe, he told me that I completely misunderstood what it was to be prepared.
Unfortunately, some of these armchair preppers have websites, and they distribute their BS to the unsuspecting.
Here’s a way to check out a website, with info and tips from the research librarian at the community college I work at: https://www.survivalcommonsense.com/website-accuracyfeed/
Thanks for that link, Leon. There’s some good advice there.
hey, at least I’ve been up front about being an “armchair survivalist” most of the time.
…and I don’t have all that many guns either.
Comon Irish, we wouldn’t accuse you of being an “armchair prepper”. Maybe a “recliner prepper”, haha.
I do have aspirations to someday get my own recliner, I appreciate your confidence in me.
I know of a young guy who did three tours in the middle east and thinks he will be able to take whatever he needs when TSHTF. He has lots of weapons and ammo.
Guys like him may have some success but I think this is only a short term strategy. People will be hunkered down and are going to shoot back.
Nobody stays undefeated forever. He must win every fight. His intended victims must each win one.
“He who attacks must vanquish. He who defends must merely survive”–master Po, 70s series “Kung Fu”
I am a confessed armchair prepper. Have it tattooed right on my MRAP, and I don’t mind munching on my WalMart trail mix while telling you so.
In the end, I don’t give a crap what you confess to do. I have my brood, and I aim to keep them alive as long as I can before Uncle BHO sends a Predator Drone my way.
Merry Christmas every one, stay safe, enjoy your family, be at peace.
Hell yeah, I know one. It’s me (compared to most of you guys). I don’t have a buttload of gear, but I can use everything I have. I don’t have water and food stores to tide me over for more than a few weeks. My fitness and training (which were once stellar) are slowly being rolled back. One thing I do have a leg up over the average joe is I grew up an outdoor enthusiast (albeit one that is out of practice as I haven’t done a backpacking trip in almost a decade). To me, wilderness survival skills are similar to riding a bike. You never truly forget how but you are more apt to be incovnienced by even the smallest obstacle. I could do WAY better but life (and the wife) kind of gets in the way. The wife is down from the self defense perspective but not from a long term prepping standpoint.
Don’t know anyone like that. That said, I don’t expect people with the “I have guns and will take what I want” attitude to make it for very long. I know if I saw someone like that trying to “take what he wants” from my neighbors I would stop him by what ever means required. I’d expect nothing less in return.
Sounds like we would be dividing up some sweet new gear.
“Shoot, Shovel and Shut Up”. I hate to say it, but it looks like when the SHTF the law of the jungle will prevail.
It’s stunning to me that lately the parasites with the “I’ll just take it” mentality seem to become common in the Prepper / Survivalist community. The TOTWAWKI hasn’t even come yet and these lazy savages are already showing their true, violent colors. It’s really blood chilling and suggests that when things get tribal there won’t be any Cumbya meetings around the campfire. To me this turn in increasingly prevalent philosophy implies an even greater importance upon the concepts of isolation and security.
An said it.
Word would get out and people would unite to hunt such a predator, or more likely, ambush them after luring them into a trap.
… and “really really smart” doesn’t preclude someone from being a sociopath.
or void of common sense.
Jason! Where the heck you been?
I have known a few, mostly on the gun nut side of the house. 30 guns, more ammo then a ranger battalion, and 2 cases of instant ramen. Their belief is to take whatever they need from sheeple. In the short term it will work until they run out of sheeple or run into a real prepper. That’s why OPSEC is always the rule…..keep your own council and keep your eyes and ears open.
LOL , its like people who advocate Communism , they advocate it because they have never lived under it , and they think that they are going to be the ones calling the shots . They are wrong on both counts . There are a lot of criminally savvy people out there that know how to use a gun , and know the city a hell of a lot better than most anyone . Cops wont go into certain situations or areas without a lot of back up , what makes these guys think they are going to move around easily without running into a situation that they are in way over their heads ?
Lots of armchair bravado and machismo on display here from everyone. Love the “Christians” toting all those guns around in the prepper community. On this day that celebrates the birth of our messiah – the prince of PEACE – one should be a little less brash, condescending, mocking, and arrogant.
Depends on whether you’re sleeping in the armchair? I read a lot – I’d rather learn from OTHER people’s mistakes! But I’ve done enough, to know how much I don’t know.
I want to share what I have learned, but I don’t want to enable a-holes, sorry. But then again, I don’t want to see a kid suffer because their parent was ignorant of something.
Then sometimes I’ll be thinking through a scenario out loud, and of course the quiet guy on the left turns out to be a Canadian mountie who’s retieved frozen corpses and could tell you all about it but never will. Just gently suggests that he might do it a little differently… then I feel stupid, but now hopefully I’ve learned a little extra.
Just want to add, the arm chair preppers are not the ones to worry about. It’s the ones that are desperate and just have nothing to lose that you need to think about. The best thing to do is prep when you can and develop a mind set that is good for you, but keep it flexible as things will change very fast until the dust settles.
Agreed , even ” armchair ” preppers are prepping . They just dont practice anything , but at least they will most likely be staying home eating their preps . All the frantic s scare me , for the same reason they scare you . I plan to hunker down as long as possible , that means defending my family and doing things that I would prefer not to have to do . Bosnia is not my idea of a good time , lets hope if it does happen , it doesn’t last long .